Thursday, August 13, 2009

Mini-Meme! Pet Stories..

As most of you know, I created a meme that only has two parts- easy, quick, and fun!
The questions today are...
1. What is the funniest pet story you can tell.
2. What is the second funniest...
I want this to be enjoyable for all, so let's try it!
You may have read my post about how my cat went "for a spin" in the dryer, and how my dog shut her head in the car window by herself, so I'll use two new stories..
My first cat was Hell on wheels, but her name was Daisy.. this was a cat who did not like to go to the vet. One time, back in my suit and tie days, I had to take her to the vet. They always requested you leave the animal in the car until you were signed in..I went back to the car, and the cat was gone! I looked everywhere-no way this beast escaped! In desperation, I even looked in the closed glove box.. she wasn't there, but fur was sticking out from holes in the top of it. She was in the dashboard,on top of the glove box! Got her out(with some difficulty) and brought her into the vet's office, where she promptly peed on me, and my new London Fog coat..Receptionist says; "You must really love that cat"..
Now the dog story.. My first Airedale(of three so far!) was a check list of all the bad things this breed is capable of! Escape Artist, Digger of Ditches, Eater Of Poop, etc.... Once when my kids were young, they left their crayons out in the family room, dog ate the entire 64 pack... Next day, I put her out to do her business, and she takes a crap in Technicolor! The look on her face was funnier than mine...
Love to hear your stories- and if you never had pets, a kid story will work too!


Melody said...

Where to start?

We were fostering a cute Golden/Corgi mix named Jasper. He was spirited and fun, but very busy. We hosted a 12 person dinner party for some close friends. Many jokes had been made about the entree - chorizo stuffed pork tenderloin wrapped in pancetta bacon (pork in pork around pork). It was a hit.

During dinner, the dogs were all outside. But after dessert they were let in because all the guests were dog lovers and everyone enjoyed meeting the new foster.

After everyone left, we were clearing the table and loading the dishwasher. My husband went into the dining room to finish getting dishes to find Jasper standing in the middle of the dining room finishing off the pork roast.

My husband, a bit startled, called for him to get down and he just looked at him and back at the pork and continued eating. "No way man, this is too good."

Our current foster is a little lemon beagle named Bamboo who weighs about 17 lbs. She is a sweetheart but very playful. We have an 8 year old American Eskimo named Shelby who just tolerates the revolving door of fosters. She doesn't play with them.

Bamboo came up on Shelby napping on the floor and decided that big fluffy white tail would be fun to play with so she grabbed it and started pulling. Literally pulling Shelby (29 lbs.) across the hardwood floor.

The look on Shelby's face was priceless. She just kept looking at us like "what are you going to do about this?"'em.

buffalodick said...

Melody- Good stuff! Our current Airedale came from rescue- she took a mouthful of fur off our second cat.. I remember taking the fur, holding it in the dog's face and saying "No! Bad!" the cat looked at me as if to say "Is that all you're going to do??!!?"

Bina said...

Oh Lord. I have had SO many pets, but in order to make this short, I'll tell you about my horse.

I was "fostering" a horse, a mustang, that could get open the gate or just get out of the fence whenever he wanted. One morning, I heard this noise on the back deck and when I went out back, there was MY horse, my TN walker on the BACK DECK! He was looking at me like "hey, you coming out?" I still don't know how that deck didn't break. And they pasture wasn't close to the house!

I had a dog like yours. A lab, escape artist no matter WHAT I did to keep her in. I had a big pen for her and her daughter. Probably about 2000 square foot. I used chicken wire on the ground, they dug a tunnel. Put electric wire up, they tore it down. But, when it first started, I could NOT figure out how they got out, until one morning, my husband called me to the front door. My labs was standing, leaning against the fence. Her daughter literally used her as a ladder. She stepped on her back with her front paws, then got her back legs up, then stood with her front paws on the top of the fence and hopped over. My lab (the mother) would then just climb up the chain link fence. It was freaking amazing to see such team work.

Beth said...

Like Bina, I have a Lab. Well, 2 Labs, but one is big and fat and doesn't do anything. the other is My Boy and I love him to death.

anone who has ever had a Lab knows that they LOVE food...and will do anything to get that food. Trooper is no exception. I walked into our dining room one day and there was Trooper....standing in the middle of the dining room table. Just standing there....looking at me like, "What? Do you need me for something?"

He's eaten entire loaves of bread....frozen steaks, styrofoam and all...sweet potato pies in the tin pie plates...tin and all. (OUCH) and he's pulled off a huge ham right off the stove..right our of the deep pan it was in, but never tipped the pan over or anything. didn't drop a bit of ham either. Then took it outside and ate it. Like it was nothing. He can pull open the refrigerator door and eat bags of lunch meat...anything he sees in there.

and he's NOT fat!!

Akelamalu said...

LOL great stories Buff - Technicolour Poo - beats the other stuff!

My first story is about our beloved dog, Guinness who was a very, very intelligent pooch, only a Heinz 57 but nevertheless he knew everything you said to him.

Eldest son was a joker and had acquired a plastic fake dog turd.
He and youngest son thought it would be a good idea to strategically place it on the lounge carpet so that when MWM came home he would think Guinness had been a naughty boy! Great fun they thought to wind up Dad. This plan was regailed with much hilarity whilst Guinness lay with head on paws, eyes opening occasionally to see what the boys were up to.

The said 't' was duly placed about half an hour before MWM was due to arrive home and the boys settled down to watch some cartoons. Guinness was asleep.

We then heard the car backing onto the drive - Guinness' eyes shot open, he jumped up, trotted over to the 't', picked it up in his mouth and promptly carried it outside and dumped it on the grass. He walked back in the house and lay down in his usual spot and went back to sleep!

Now tell me he didn't know what he was doing!

Before we got Guinness we had a budgie called Garry. Eldest son wanted to call his new brother Garry so we got him a budgie and let him call that Garry instead. Anyway, we used to let Garry out of his cage to fly around but forgot to shut the window one day and he escaped. MWM, I and the kids were all running up and down the street shouting "Garry, Garry" - the neighbours thought we were looking for a child! We never did find Garry. :(

Mr. Condescending said...

Lol at getting in the dash!

I was watching austin powers goldmember on dvd like 6 years ago with a girlfriend and I kept hearing. A rumbling noise in the kitchen. Nothing there.

When I listened closer, I opened the fridge and somehow my cat got stuck in there and destroyed everything in a panic. It was right after thanksgiving and there was pumpkin pie and chocolate pie. All in his fur along with milk, kool aid and all sorts of clawed apart condiments.

blueviolet said...

omg, your stories were hilarious. We've never really had pets, tried a couple of times, but it's not for me. My youngest always acted like a pet with his Nerf balls though. He would take bites out of them and spit it out and do this all over the entire ball so it did look like a chew toy. I couldn't figure out why he did that. Every single Nerf object he owned was littered with bite mark craters.

g-man said...

We have a jet black cat named Remi.
We have had him for 5 years.
In that 5 years he has NEVER came to me.
Never has sat on my lap.
He has Never let me pet him.
BUT...If I am eating ice cream, he will come and lick my spoon when I'm done ...lil bastard!!!

Hit 40 said...

I like that my cats leave any caught house mice in their water bowl for us.

Marjie said...

Funniest story: Mastiff #1 was born 4th of July 1987. Christmas Eve, a noise from outside spooked him. He leaped straight through the Christmas tree and knocked that sucker right over. Believe me, even as a little pup, only a bit over 100 pounds, he could do damage! And I assure you that I was a whole lot less than pleased.

Second: Cat named Feet with extra toes. In the house where we lived in 1980, there was a flowering pear tree in the side yard. Feet would climb to the top of the tree, causing it to bend over, and yowl at migrating birds. Perhaps he thought he would make them believe he was a friendly big fat birdy. He also brought us gifts, and left them squarely in front of the front door to the house, if we let him stay out overnight. His favorite sleeping place was in the dryer, when it was open, with clean laundry in it.

Want a kid story? How about the time my 4 year old daughter got her 3 year old brother to flush a bunch of weebles down the toilet?

Chef E said...

When we got our Lhasa, hubby really did not like small dogs, and it was a love hate relationship between them both...he hated her, and she pooped in his office and closet near his day way after she became more house broken (long story but we got her from someone who did not take care of her) I had made some brownies and my son and I rolled a few up and placed them on hubby's office floor, and then we called him in to report the presents, but as we were rolling in the floor at his reaction, I realized I had to rescue her from him or her nose would have gone right into something she would have eaten and dogs cannot have...hubby to this day if he hears brownies makes a unpleasant grunt...

The only think our cat ever did when my daughter was around was surprise us with two kittens on the doorstep for which I suddenly became a grandmother to Oreo's brood...cookie and chip my daughter named ran in the family even with pets...

Dana said...

No pet stories, but just wanted to stop in and say "HI!"

KB said...

My cat loves to chase the neighbours dog on a regular basis.

As for my dog...she makes me laugh every day. If I think of a specific story I'll come back and tell it.

Donna-FFW said...

Funny pet story. I was going to meet my new neighbor and my tiny shitzu was with me. I was carrying him.. he was playing in the yard and had no leash.

My neighbor is a real classy lady , you know the type, and here I am with my denim shorts and tank top and she's all made up with heels and a coach bag. So she reaches out to pet my Clooney, saying what a cute puppy, when all of a sudden I notice he has something in his mouth. He dropped in .. it was a piece of his poop. He was eating his poop in front of classy lady. She almost gagged. I almost gagged. Then I had to laugh. She didn't though.. Oh well. I do have plenty of other down to earth neighbors.:)

buffalodick said...

Bina- Both your stories were great!
Beth- Our first two Airedales could not be trusted around unattended- food both "counter surfers.. Funny stuff!
Ake- Smart dog! Wasn't going to take the fall lying down!
Mr.C- We shut our sleeping cat in a clothes drawer once- didn't know she was in there taking a nap! The fridge? That's funny!
BlueV- That is peculiar!
G-Man- My cat will jump right on the table for ice cream too!
Hit40- Her way of showing her love for you....
Marjie- Weebles wobble but they don't flush down! Good stories!
ChefE- We didn't know about the chocolate thing for years.. We named our 2nd cat "Snickers"- she was a Calico who was colored kind of like a Snickers bar..
Dana- Hi back at cha!
KB- Our first two cats didn't take crap from the dogs, either!
Donna- Our dog seldom got caught doing it, but she always wanted to give your face a big lick... you figured out what she'd been doing quickly!

Hit 40 said...

I guess I should have cooked the mouse up for the family :-)

Katherine Aucoin said...

When our dog, Scout, was a puppy, she was a very destructive chewer. By the time she chewed up the timer for the pool and the gutter downspout, my husband was livid. He bought a new timer and downspout and coated them both in a paste made of cayenne pepper. She chewed them up anyway, the cayenne didn't seem to bother her one bit going down. Later that evening the cayenne kick in coming out and we didn't have anymore chewing problems with her.

buffalodick said...

Hit40- I bought my wife a Siamese cat before we were married, she lived in the country- and this animal was the best mouser ever! One time at Sunday dinner the cat brings in a sparrow, still alive..swatted the cat, cat drops bird, which starts flying around the living jumped, caught the bird in mid-air! I grabbed the cat, took her outside and made her cough up the bird-again! If looks could kill, I'd be dead of cat-glare..
Katherine- Good trick- but then, I like hot peppers! Birds can eat the seeds of hot peppers with no effect, that's how most pepper plants get distributed in the wild, encased in their own fertilizer!

TavoLini said...

LOL--these are great! I don't have much, but here is one.

My mom hear this loud clacking in the middle of the night one night when we were little. She went downstairs and wandered around, looking for the source. Clack. Clack. She opened up the garage door, and it got louder. Clack. Clack-clack. There, she saw one of our toys with a plastic lid--and the lid was going up and down on it's own. Clack clack clack. She reached over to open the lid...and a giant toad hopped out! (I used to really love toads when I was little)

buffalodick said...

Tavolini- Why doe this not suprise me? Funny as heck!

Heff said...

I.....just can't top a Crayon Crapper.

buffalodick said...

Heff- For what it's worth, wax is a good lube.... Crayola should start marketing pet food!


I found a stray kitten abandonned in the road, but as he was a tough thing, I think that he had been a barn cat who was dumped in the city.
The first thing he did , when I brought him home, was climb up my hanging plant, chewing and spitting out leaves as he went.

He once clawed his way up my landlord's leg,biting it as he went. As my landlord shook his leg to free him,he got even more rabbid.

One day he was laying on the window ledge enjoying the sun and rolled over,falling three stories.
I rushed out to get the littl bastard and he was fine other than a limP. He was sore so no problem for a whole week.
I called him Gumby-and he was the most evil little cat I ever had. But he had spirit!

buffalodick said...

UbberM- Cats have nine lives.. our current cat lived in a dumpster behind a meat market... the ultimate survivor.. Today, she is simply spoiled rotten..Welcome to the blog!

starbender said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
starbender said...

Okay--True story:
I was camping a few years back, and had a 4-door Lincoln Continental. I was sitting in the camper, and heard this very LOUD CRASH===>>I ran outside-only to find my friends truck PLOWED in my Lincoln!!! AUGH--->>and of course, his German Shepard was driving. Needless to say, I was just out of a car. My friend had been visiting a neighbor, left the dog in the running truck, and the rest is history!!!

snowelf said...

Hey ya, UncleBuf,

Had a cat named Jacques when I was five. He was wicked smart. (Hey! I'm from Boston now...) He used to let me dress him up in doll clothes and be my baby. One day I was playing and I had this little grocery cart. The cat stood up and put his paws on it and pushed it across the living room. Another time, he wanted to go outside, so he headed over to the front door and tried to turn the doorknob with his paws. he also would walk around wearing our Mr. Potato Head Glasses--I'm sure proving how distinguished and intelligent he was. ;) He was a really great cat.


Chris said...

1 - When I lived with my parents after my head injury in the early 90's, I let my weimeraner out each morning at 5am to get the paper on her own. One morning I open the door and she bounded out as usual but immediately did a 180 turn as I stood by the door. A cat ran by me and into the house. I grabbed the door and shut it just before my dog got in after the cat.

I manage to get inside without the dog coming with me. I look around and find the "cat" (it was actually a possum!) in our dining room under a chair. Every time we moved the furniture it hid behind, it ran behind the next piece. We did that piece by piece (13 in all) until we got that possum by the front door and it took off.

2 - Same dog (very well behaved, believe it or not), Alexis and I married now, I had cooked a flank steak on a gasser (I know! Me with a gasser?) and we went to call the kids in for dinner. Came back in and the plate was still on the kitchen counter, as clean as can be, like nothing had ever been on it. The "innocent" look on that dogs face was priceless.

Jeanne said...

The first dog I ever owned as a (semi-) adult, when I was 19, was spoiled absolutely rotten. When we went to visit my husband's parents she always got to go along, despite the fact that she was pretty badly behaved. Once She got up on my MIL's table and ate half the sheetcake Mom had made for the preacher. My MIL just cut away the chewed part and covered it over with icing and took it on to church -- and told us to keep bringing the dog with us.

Another time when she was just a small puppy, some friends came over One friend, Patty, was well-endowed. Suddenly she made this kind of squeaky noise, and we looked over to see the dog sitting perched on Patty's breasts. Claire was looking around and panting, well-pleased with her vantage-point. It was awkward -- how do you order your dog to dismount from someone's breasts? I finally yelled, "Claire, get down from there!" which is about the time Clueless Young Husband totally lost it....

buffalodick said...

StarB- Funny stuff! At least the dog wasn't drunk...
Snow- That sounds like a once in a lifetime cat...
Chris- Possum? I'd like a video of that one!
Jeanne- A puppiy siting on a pair of "puppies"... Lucky dog!

buffalodick said...

Each and every one of you had good stories to tell! I enjoyed your responses to no end... We do love our pets, don't we?

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

I'm laughing too hard at your stories to think of some of my fun and funny pets...I'll have to come back later after I mull it over a bit! I'm still laughing! :)

deb said...

your kids and post pets always crack me up.

i have had many pets with a lot of silliness. the one that comes to mind is when my past pup got his head stuck in a potato chip bag and could not figure out how to get it off. i left him that way for awhile. oh and we stuck a light up rudolph the rednose reindeer nose on bella, that was fun.

buffalodick said...

Stacy- We got a lot of funny stories from everyone!
Deb- Bella the red-nosed reindeer?

JihadGene said...

I got a dog.
I wok'd my dog.
It tasted good.

North, Korea