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Saturday, July 21, 2007

When a Dentist says "If we hurry"......

Friday, I was scheduled to have my teeth cleaned. The dental office I go to are all old friends who expect a joke or two when I come in. I had forewarned them I had broken a crown, but wasn't causing any pain. When I got there, my bud Charlene was missing because her son was having problems and was at the hospital all night. The Doc looked at my little problem and proclaimed not only broken crown, but the one in back of it needed replacing too! He just happened to have a cancellation, that left him 2hrs of free time. "Let's do them both right now!" I said OK before I realized the ramifications of that commmitment... I was in that damn chair for over 2-1/2 hrs.! Because he was rushing a bit, it wasn't the "gentle dentistry" I'm used to. 4 shots of Novacane will numb you to your groin! Damage this morning(Sat.) burned inner lip from cleansing agents, a jaw that will open about 65%, and a few drill marks on my tongue! Temporary crowns, a bill that should get my attentioon, and I didn't even get my teeth cleaned yet..... I'm loyal to my friends, but Jeezo-Petes"!!!
Oh yeah, the joke: Guy goes into a bar, good looking bartentress only person in the place. Big sign behind her reads "Hamburgers $1.50, Cheeseburgers $2.00, Handjobs $5.00!
The guy asks the bartentress "Are you the one who does the hand jobs?" She answers with a wink "I sure am!" The guy then says "Could you please go wash your hands- I'd like a Cheeseburger, please".

15 comments:

snowelf said...

Ooo...I am not a fan of dentists whatsoever. They are a necessity, I know, but I think I'd rather go to the o.b. than the dentist! :P
I hope you feel better soon!!

That joke is great!!!! :D

--snow

Jen said...

Oh my, he did a number on you didn't he?! And he calls himself your friend? You should sue! ; )
I hope your mouth feels better soon.

Tanya Kristine said...

hahahah....kinda gross ; )

no body likes the dentis but i too have a the greatest dentist ever. gives me nitrous when i get my teeth cleaned. i actaully look FORWARD to my cleanings@ and i need like 14 shots of novocaine which makes me look like i have bells palsy. it ain't pretty.

Mike Minzes said...

I'm no fan either. The Navy didn't know what Novocain was, so as a kid I can to hate the dentist.

Great joke!!

buffalodick said...

Snowniece-The guy really is a friend, but crap! He kicked my butt Friday!Joke is not bad, is it?
Jen- I don't sue anybody, and thanks for the kind words...
Tanya- Drugs would have helped big time!
Mike-Welcome back! I love jokes-they make dentists tolerable!!

HAR said...

Drill marks on your tongue...painful.

Akelamalu said...

Oooer I don't mind dentist but I don't like what they do!

Loved the joke. :)

urban vegan said...

Yikes! My Omniman recently had a similar problem. Hope you're all healed up by now.

I grew up in a small, boondockian town in the mountains and had deep cavities filled as a child without novacaine. I am still traumatized by the experience.

buffalodick said...

Akelamalu- Welcome back! This is the same guy on New Years' Day met me at his office and did an emerency root canal! He is my friend! He did his best, but that was the worst dental experience of my life...
Har- I got a big tongue, and it gets in the way alot..
Urban Veggie- Once when I was young, the most beautiful dental assistant I ever met dropped an entire filling down my throat! Thank God for inert metals...

Stephanie Faris said...

UGHHH...dental problems drive me crazy. It can all be so expensive. But then I know a couple of people who have just let their teeth fall out and that's even scarier!

pinknest said...

what! aaah that sounds like a nightmare. and why does novocaine always seem to last forver?!

S* said...

You poor thing. But at least it's all done. Hope you're feeling better by now.

Lynda said...

I don't mind the dentist but that doesn't sound like a good trip.

Pam said...

i am here by way of akelamalu...i HATE going to the dentist. so far, most dental work i've had has been rather painless w the exception of the one time i didn't fill the prescription for vicodin after a major root canal. after the novocaine wore off i thought i was going to die lol needless to say, i filled that scrip asap the nxt day!

i dislike hygienists as well...esp if u know u have bad teeth or whatever and the whole time they're cleaning they tell u the same thing over and over. it's like hello b**** clean my teeth and shut the hell up lmao

feel better soon!

TMI Queen said...

I'm sorry, I stopped reading after the "numbing to the groin" part.

I know, I'm a pervert. LOL